Evernew Jokes Funny Jokes and Cute SMS

Dont tell your partner about that perfect present you almost bought.Dont give the same Valentine card you gave your partner last year. Dont buy the wrong size/brand of anything.Don’t forget to wear clean underwear. Dont tell your date you forgot your wallet again. Dont leave your date alone with your parents, flatmates or pet. Dont buy your partner household ...

1. What is the thinnest book in the world?“What Men Know About Women” 2. Whats the difference between men and government bonds?Bonds mature 3. How do you save a man from drowning?Take your foot off his head 4. What do men and beer bottles have in common?Theyre both empty from the neck up 5. How can you tell if ...

Little David comes home from first grade and tells his father that they learned about the history of Valentines Day. “Since Valentines Day is for a Christian saint and were Jewish,” he asks, “will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?” Davids father thinks a bit, then says “No, I dont think God ...

1. A box of chocolates, clumsily rearranged in an attempt to hide the fact you ate all the caramel ones. 2. Any food item with the words “diet”, “light”, or “high fiber” on the label. 3. Any video starring Sylvester Stallone or Jim Carrey. 4. Flowers from a hospitals gift shop–or worse, a mortuarys. 5. Any household appliance, power ...

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up ...

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up ...

1. I really dont like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. 2. People say I remind them of Eddie Haskell. 3. I used to come here all the time with my ex. 4. I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldnt hurt to consider ...

Cabbage always has a heart;Green beans string along.Youre such a Tomato,Will you Peas to me belong?Youve been the Apple of my eye,You know how much I care;So Lettuce get together,Wed make a perfect Pear. Now, somethings sure to Turnip,To prove you cant be Beet;So, if you Carrot all for meLets let our tulips meet. Dont Squash my ...

A very shy guy goes into a pub on Valentines Day night and sees a beautiful young woman sitting alone at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively, “Um, would you mind if I brought you a drink?” She responds by yelling, at ...

Four-year-old Mitch loved candy almost as much as his mom Ann did. He and Daddy had given her a beautiful heart-shaped box of chocolates for Valentines Day. A few days later Mitch was eyeing it, wishing to have a piece of it. As he reached out to touch one of the big pieces, Ann said ...