Top Things You Don't Want to Overhear Over an Airline P.A. System
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Overhear Over an Airline P.A. System
|1. Ocean crossing flight: This is your Captain speaking, I just
wanted to take this time to remind you that your seat cushions can be used as floatation devices.2. Hey
folks, we're going to play a little game of geography trivia. If you can recognize where we are, tell your
flight attendant and receive an extra pack of peanuts.3. Our loss of altitude allows a unique close up
perspective of the local terrain. I assure you that it's all part of our airline's new commitment to make
your a flight a sight seeing extravaganza. 4. Goose! Bogey at 2 o'clock....one on our tail!!!! Eject!!!!
Eject!!!!!!!5. Ummmmmm....Sorry......(silence) 6. (As the plane turns around right after
takeoff)....uhhhhh....we have to go back ....we ..we ....uhhhhhh ....forgot something..... 7. I'm sure
everyone noticed the loss of an engine, however the reduction in weight and drag will mean we'll be flying
much more efficiently now.8. Fasten your seat belt. (same tone your friend with the suicidal driving
tendencies uses when you get in the car).9. This is your Captain speaking....these stupid planes are a lot
different than the ships I'm used to.. so you'll have to give me some leeway... 10. It would be a good
idea if right now everyone closed their shades and watched the in-flight movie.11. We've now reached our
cruising altitude of 20,000 feet and ... Oh noooooooo!!!!!.. 12. Don't worry! That one is always on E...
13. Get the parachutes ready... 14. Drinks are on me...15. I'll have what the Captain's having... 16. Hey
capt'n take another hit man...
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