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While assembling furniture, my friend Debbie asked her roommate’s five-year-old son to bring her a screwdriver.
“Do you want a ‘Daddy’ screwdriver or a ‘Mommy’ screwdriver?” the little boy asked.
Confused but preoccupied, Debbie absentmindedly said, “Bring me a ‘Mommy’ screwdriver.”
The child came back and handed her a butter knife.
– Contributed by Cori Cole
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While waiting in a bookstore for a guest author to sign her latest book, I leafed through some of the Civil War novels she had written. The woman in line behind me commented, “Those are the best books I’ve ever read. I couldn’t put them down.”
Before I could reply, the author looked over and said, ...
After a long, exhausting day, a friend of mine headed home. On the road, he passed an elderly woman who was standing by a car with a flat tire. His conscience got the better of him; if that were his mother, he thought, he would want someone to help her. With a tired sigh, he ...
Here is a light hearted presentation of what we all think about our moms, at different points of our lives. Don’t get surprised because we all have the same tendency towards our mothers!
4 Years Of Age – My Mommy can do anything;
8 Years Of Age – My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot
12 Years ...
Mother to daughter advice:
Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
...
Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:
Your Clothes -
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: ...
You automatically double-knot everything you tie.
You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes.
You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school!
You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce.
You ...
My Mother Taught Me About…
1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION…
“Just wait until your father gets home.”
2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING….
“You are going to get it when we get home!”
3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE…
“What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don’t talk back to me!”
4. ...
A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.
“Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my staring ...
1. “How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”
2. “Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”
3. “Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery”
4. “Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week”
5. “Go ahead and keep that stray dog, ...